The Shock of Betrayal “How could he do this to me? We’ve known each other for years!” This is the most common reaction when we get stabbed in the back. But why are we always surprised? Because we judge trust using the wrong metric: the duration and title of the relationship.
The Flaw in Our Logic We operate on a simple but flawed algorithm:
- Close Friend = Trustworthy
- Relative = Safe
- Stranger = Risky
But trust is a character trait, not a relationship benefit. Just because someone is your childhood friend doesn’t guarantee they haven’t changed over the years. Time changes people, and often, greed overrides old bonds.
Intimacy vs. Integrity There is a massive difference between “closeness” and “integrity.” You might have a cousin who is very close to you (Intimacy), but they might lack the moral compass to resist a financial temptation (Integrity). Conversely, a stranger returning a lost wallet on the street has zero intimacy with you but high integrity.
The “Nice Guy” Syndrome We often confuse “nice behavior” with honesty. A business partner might be charming and polite while embezzling your funds. Stop looking at how sweetly they talk; start observing how they handle small ethical dilemmas.
Conclusion: Audit Your Circle Stop handing out trust like free candy based on relationship tags. Observe people. Watch their actions when money or pressure is involved. Trust the person, not the position they hold in your life.
